Karma is a B word

Evening,

Since my last post, I have spent a few nights living in the Cape Tribulation Daintree Rain Forest!  This is the oldest rain forest on the planet!  Unfortunately, I don't have many pictures because it was pouring rain the whole time.  The forest gets over 30ft of rain a year!  Who knew? I think we got a foot of rain while I was there.  Lame.  Side note, If you don't like spiders, don't spend two nights living in a rain forest.  

Where this particular rain forest meets The Pacific, is where Steve Irwin "The Crocodile Hunter" was killed  by the stingray.  

Upon finding this out, I was so inspired by the moment that I hustled off the beach and proceeded to book a Crocodile "Hunting" Tour.  I was just looking for them, not killing them.   However, karma is a B word.  Some of you may remember that I dressed up as Steve Irwin a few years back for Halloween…  I didn't even wait for his body to get cold.  I went right ahead with the costume anyways.  Well, I'm fairly certain that I am the first person in the history of Australian crocodile tours, that did not see a single crocodile.  Heartbreaking stuff.  I guess I had that one coming. UGGHH.

On my way back down the coast to Cairns, I made a side trip through Port Douglas.  This is like the Hamptons/Nantucket of Australia.  After an hour or so of walking the streets looking for a Kardashian to marry for a week or two , I called it quits and made my way back to Cairns.

The next morning, I hopped on another boat out to the Pacific!  Round two!  I spent two days sailing around the Great Barrier Reef!  Unfortunately, the bad weather continued and it was raining the whole time there as well.  However, scuba diving the Great Barrier Reef falls somewhere near the top of the list of things I have done in my life.  It didn't hurt that my scuba instructor was a French speaking knockoff of Rachel Mcadam's.  She spoke almost no English and the extent of my french vocabulary begins and ends at Bonjour.  I felt this worked to my advantage.  Seeing as she had no idea what I was saying, I couldn't mess things up too badly.  I'm pretty sure she liked me.   Anyways, I truly couldn't believe what I was seeing.  The Coral! Sharks! My Scuba Instructor! Billions of fish!  Eels! Turtles etc.   

On the way back from the reef, I saw a DOUBLE RAINBOW!! I kid you not.  DOUBLE FREAKIN RAINBOW!!  I did my best to jokey for position on the ferry to get a few pictures.  No women or children were spared from my elbows.   However, I have the JD Drew of Cameras.  (Non Bostonians: JD Drew is/was the Red Sox right fielder and he stinks.)  I KNOW my jokes are not funny.  And I know if I have to explain them, they are the worst.  Then I found $5.

OK, I'll stop.

Mark/Chops

The Future Is No Place To Place Your Better Days

After a week at sea in the rain, the stinking sun came out as we entered Cairns Harbor

I had Lucky Charms, pots of gold, and the Double Rainbow Youtube video racing through my mind.  I saw this on the way back from 2 days sailing around the Great Barrier Reef in the pouring rain.

Check out all the Crocodiles! Oh wait, I didn't see any!  WTF MATE!

This picture is for Richard Bernard and John Ross Crooks  Nobody else will get it. Not a bad effort though?? I'm so heavy these days that I just pull down the trees to get the coconuts.  My arms are still bleeding...

Cape Tribulation Daintree Rain Forest - The world's oldest Rain Forest

This picture from a lookout in the rain forest overlooking The Pacific would have been amazing if I knew how to take good pictures, had a nice camera, and it wasn't pouring.  Steven Speilberg's PACIFIC was filmed down there.

Can't find anything to eat outside of the US...  I have resorted to Bear Grylls' favorite meal.  Oh, I was encouraged not to do this.

I felt I had no other options to properly relay how big the spiders in the rain forest are.    FYI: That is a very fake smile.  The Golden Orb Spider has been known to eat entire goats.  OK, I made that last part up.  

Steve Irwin "The Crocodile Hunter" died right behind me.  I took a knee in his honor.  For real, I loved the guy.  This is where the Rain Forest met The Pacific, and soon after, The Great Barrier Reef.